I am currently traveling in the Midwest for a little more than a week. I checked in at home this morning to find that my son would not go to school today. He was "tired".
To bring you up to speed quickly, my son is a gifted 6th grader, with ADHD. He has been struggling with mornings of anxiety, which in turn becomes "not feeling well" enough to go to school. This has occurred on and off for about 3 years. So far this school year he has missed 8 days.
Before anyone jumps to the conclusion that this is a matter of a "lack of discipline" or poor parenting by enabling parents, I can assure you it is neither. It is so real to him that he has gone as far as jumping out of a moving car on the way to school.
Threats of punishment have no impact at the time of the event. He is in another world when it is happening. Positive reinforcements and rewards can be of limited help.
My wife was at the end of her rope. We talked about how he should spend his day. He has been lagging in Math. I suggested that my wife have my son spend his day working on Math exercises and work around the house, particularly cleaning bathrooms. I spoke with him and told him that it was fine that he was home, but that he was going to either learn to study or learn to work.
A call to my wife later brought good news. After cleaning the two bathrooms on his hands and knees and vacuuming the second floor of the house, he told my wife that he wanted to lay down. She reminded him that there was still a great deal of work to do. She also suggested that going to school was probably a bit easier then the work she had lined up for the day.
He made it to school in time for his Math class. Another day survived.
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